online personals & the dating pool. Or is it poo?

28 08 2007

So, my latest rant in life is the dating pool (which is one l away from poo). Some people seem to have luck with online personals, so I decided to try one. First of all, I did one around a year ago with limited success and then deleted it. A month or two ago I went and did another.

So, this time, it’s working out so bad that it’s almost comical.

What I have observed is that the vast majority of people cannot spell.
“u r hawt”
“u r a qt. msn me @ XXXX”
Lest I sound like a spelling snob, I’m not all that concerned about the odd spelling mistake, but come on. Form a sentence, people.

Along with that, many people who send me messages seem to just want to have an MSN relationship. I can see that meeting people first online can be ‘convenient’ (although it has not been in my experiences so far). But the point isn’t to date online… is it? I’ll date my computer instead. It’s pretty open-minded, talks and likes to play chess.

I also don’t care what kind of car they drive. Ugh. Yes, countless people like to tell me. I don’t care, really.

And when curiosity prompts me to check out their profile, if they have no interests or profile description, then I assume they are pretty boring. Judgmental of me? Probably. Even if they are ‘hawt’ it would be nice to know something about them and what makes them tick….

“I like nerds” isn’t a good opening line either. I’ll admit that I am a bit intellectually inclined and have some unconventional interests, but being called a nerd isn’t a good pick-up line.

My next – and more serious- observation is that the majority of men on the site (or at least those who message me) are married. Married. While I have married friends who happen to be men, I didn’t meet them on dating sites. I’m not sure why married people would use a dating site to meet ‘friends.’ Thus, I assume they are looking for something else… and my answer to that is…. NO. In fairness to them, the vast majority have at least admitted they are married.

I’m not sure i’m sending out ‘looking for married men’ vibes… I think my profile is pretty ‘me’, as do friends who have reviewed it. I’d like to know what about me attracts the married men? And it kind of creeps me out that so many of them are out there looking. So my faith in online dating has not been redeemed. Where are the single men who have brains? Maybe I should start hanging out in libraries…. Is it too much to want to find someone who is smart, a little weird, fun, active and has a good sense of humor? Also preferably not a neat freak either and can handle chaos and disorder? Maybe I’ll write my name in Love in the Time of Cholera, leave it at a used bookstore and hope for a Serendipity type of experience?

So for now… I’m trying to avoid the poo… Anyone got an l?